by Lisa Redmond, a graduate of Southwest Institute of Healing Arts' Associate of Occupational Studies Degree in Mind/Body Transformational Psychology and the Master Practitioner of Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching programs.
Children experience many changes and challenges that can cause stress and upset their world to the point of emotional outbursts, restlessness, sleeplessness, anxiety and even panic attacks. These are all symptoms of stress that must be dealt with on a very sensitive level.
Oftentimes children feel the need to please their parents, teachers, coaches and other individuals with whom they look up to. They also tend to seek approval from their peers. This can mean being invited to sleepovers, birthday parties or participating in sporting events or competitions. While these are healthy parts of development, if not kept in perspective, can damage self-esteem and create unnecessary stress.
Children often have a hard time expressing their feeling in words and connecting the dots from an event to their feelings. This can be very frustrating to a caring parent who wants nothing more than to make it all better for their child. Here are a few tips to assist you in helping your child manage their own stress.
- Find out who they think is the most powerful superhero they can imagine. Try asking, “What would (superhero) do in this situation?” This will allow them to get some creative ideas to help break them out of their mindset. Gently guide them into positive thinking, being careful not to discount their thoughts. Your child may even be able to realize that what they were stressing about isn’t so bad.
- Encourage your child to spend quiet time listening to their inner thoughts. You might choose to do some breathing exercises with them.
- Promote the importance of exercise. Keep in mind that too much activity can be a source of stress as well. There’s plenty of relaxing, inward exercises that you can do together such as yoga, tai chi or even taking walks.
- Gather information about whatever it is that they may be stressing about and share it with them. You may find stories of other kids who experienced the same sort of situations or feelings and what worked for them. The more supportive you can be, the more they will appreciate your efforts.
- Take some time to observe the different environments that your child encounters on a regular basis. Look at your home, their classroom and their peers. What kind of pressures are being put on them, are they appropriate and what pressures are they putting on themselves?
- Lead by example. This is probably the hardest for parents to do, and the most important. When we are able to manage our stress in a healthy way, our children are more capable of learning these same healthy skills. It is important to know that you are the best parent for your child, and they will follow your lead.
Lisa Redmond is the owner of True Self Connection, LLC. She works with families and children, specializing in building self-esteem and confidence. You can reach Lisa at 602-680-6700.
by Rev. Sandy Jones, a graduate of Southwest Institute of Healing Arts' Associate of Occupational Studies Degree in Mind/Body Transformational Psychology and Life Coaching program.
For many of us, we get lost in the quagmire of life, being bumped around and feeling victimized at times. We think we have no control, no power and no peace. We think we are rushed. We think we are stressed. Energy follows thought therefore we create what we experience with our every thought.
Be still and know. Peace is possible, and it only takes a second to change your mind. Take a moment to imagine your mind as a mental garden. It can be a beautiful place to spend time in, with peace filled thoughts, and wonderful path ways to explore.
You can choose serenity and feel the liquid pleasure of peace flowing through you like a river. When you are still and quiet your mind can be a place where you can go to for safety, you can use it to create and to imagine the limitless possibilities of your experience.
As the gardener of this place you get to choose what thoughts get to stay that will nurture the inner beauty of your mind, and you can choose to weed out the thoughts which can wreak havoc and bring forth chaos to both your inner and outer experience. If you invest in negative thoughts, they continue to grow and before you know it, the beautiful garden is over grown with weeds that strangle the beautiful flowers once planted there.
Pay attention to what thoughts come in as you awaken each day. Listen in and find out if you are thinking thoughts of resentment towards the alarm clock and having to go to work, or if you are thinking thoughts towards creating a day of magnificence.
Tune into your mental garden and take care of it as a wise gardener would. Fertilize it with nurturing thoughts of love, and peace. Breathe in deeply and allow the oxygen to flow through. Fill your thoughts with hope and happiness and keep your mind open to endless possibilities. You might be surprised as you do for life on the inside creates life on the outside.
You have all the tools you need to tend and nurture your mental garden. Recognize that your thoughts are a choice and you can choose how your mental garden will grow.
Sandy Jones worked as a designer, teacher, software specialist and entrepreneur in the tech industry for 25 years. She recently created Soul Motivations, a ministry devoted to helping people remember. 4480-491-2464 or
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by Lisa Redmond, a graduate of Southwest Institute of Healing Arts' Associate of Occupational Studies Degree in Mind/Body Transformational Psychology and the Master Practitioner of Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching programs.
Countless times as parents or caregivers we have witnessed the chocolaty face saying, “I didn’t eat the candy!” Or, “It wasn’t me!” Of course we can see the truth behind it, but why do children lie? They certainly don’t come into this world knowing how to lie, but by the age of two they become experts. The truth is we all lie from time to time and for different reasons. When is it acceptable? Even more importantly, what truths can we teach our children about lying?
Many believe it’s a matter of intention. Understanding the true intention behind the lie can be the determining factor. For some, lying about how great someone looks can be perfectly acceptable. In fact, it has the potential to make someone feel good. However, denying that we spilled the grape juice on the carpet is unacceptable. What we want is to avoid the acceptance of lies and push for truth in our children. Here are some solutions that can help you do that.
Truth: Some children believe that lying is a way to avoid punishment.
Lie: It works.
Solution: Teach the importance of accepting responsibility for your own actions. Children who learn the importance of honesty have a higher level of self-esteem and more confidence in their ability to accept and cope with making mistakes. When a child lives in fear of punishment, you have lost the battle of teaching truth vs. lying.
Truth: Some children believe that lying is a way to please others.
Lie: It works.
Solution: As adults, we tend to do this often. With children, tact and respect for others’ feelings are two things that can be difficult to teach. You can teach children to use kind and gentle words when expressing honest feedback to someone. Following this honesty with a compliment is a great way to convey caring. By putting this into practice children learn that it is possible to be honest with someone without jeopardizing their security in the relationship.
Truth: Some children believe that there is a difference between a little lie and a big lie.
Lie: There is.
Solution: This is a great opportunity to teach the meaning of credibility. No matter what size the lie, it’s still a lie. Children need to learn the importance of being truthful and how the consequence of losing their credibility affects their friends and family. When someone loses trust in them due to lying, they will find it difficult to keep friendships. Isolation is the end result which has a definite impact on how they feel about themselves as individuals. Learning to maintain solid relationships is a fundamental part of building self-worth.
There are a lot of reasons for lying, but taking the time to educate children on the truths about lying is important to their moral development. When children learn to accept responsibility for their actions by telling the truth, they can better manage and cope with mistakes. Everybody makes them. So, the question is who is confident enough to tell the truth with chocolate on their face?
Lisa Redmond is the owner of True Self Connection, LLC. She works with families and children, specializing in building self-esteem and confidence. You can reach Lisa at 602-680-6700.
by Rev. Sandy Jones, a graduate of Southwest Institute of Healing Arts' Associate of Occupational Studies Degree in Mind/Body Transformational Psychology and Life Coaching program.
Faith: Belief without proof, reliance, confidence. Belief in God. Loyalty, fidelity to an agreement or promise. A religious creed.
The dictionary definition sums this up well. It is what our minds understand the definition of faith to be. But how easy is it to have faith?
There are times when we really have to convince ourselves to have faith. Believing in something we cannot see is difficult. Our mind, the great ruler of logical thought bumps up against this all the time. It happens most often when our lives become so challenging we can’t possibly imagine there is anything to have faith in.
When we watch the unfolding of natural catastrophes, or when we experience unemployment, divorce, illness or death of a loved one, it is difficult to imagine how to maintain a sense of faith. For some, it is the very undoing of their faith. But for others it is faith that keeps them alive.
Events such as these will test our faith beyond comprehension. We wonder how any of this is good. How can any of this serve a higher purpose? We can’t see it. We look for evidence, as if we need some kind of proof that there is something greater that our limited self in existence. How do we have faith when life happens at a volume that prevents us from hearing the stillness and softness that faith brings in? How can we hear faiths gentle voice when it’s drowned out by the ranting of our mind?
Be still and know…
Like the breath of life within us, faith continues to exist. Faith whispers in our ears, in quiet moments. It is never gone from us, we just need to remember.
Imagine that faith is like the conduit to heaven. It’s like an open channel broadcasting hope and grace. When we are open we can connect and hear the words of wisdom that we need, but when we are too busy or simply shut down our mental channel is closed, and we feel alone and lost.
Next time life challenges you. Next time, you don’t know what to do next. Remember…
Be still and know. Consciously listen for the still voice. As you do, realize you are connecting to the channel of soul faith.
Soul Faith: A depth of belief which transcends the mind. A deep knowing or feeling and belief in the essence of truth which exists in timeless space.
Sandy Jones worked as a designer, teacher, software specialist and entrepreneur in the tech industry for 25 years. She recently created Soul Motivations, a ministry devoted to helping people remember. 480-491-2464 or
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